Civility No More: The Art of a Freakshow

Portland, Oregan
Population: 529,121

Portland, Oregan. Where the sun is shiny, the ice is slippery, and everyone is stoked to see the president. Well, unless it's August 22, 2002, the day that the Portland chapter of the Pacific Green Party went out of their way as they joined circles to turn a Bush speech into a hatemongering convention. And no, I don't refer to the conservative minority as the hatemongers. As it became evident that the protesters would not keep their cool, the police declared a state of emergency on the rowdy crowd of Bush-haters. As the protesters refused to pipe down, the police were forced to fight back. One victim of pepper spray was a ten-month old baby. That's right. Someone had the nerve to bring a young infant to a radical left-wing frenzy. Luckily, the child was okay. But let this story be a warning to those who insist on protesting: find a sitter. When police officers are threatened, they will strike back. I know, how brutal.

On March 18 of this year, they were at it again. While some left-wing blogs have insisted that the protests were peaceful, they are leaving an audience misguided. According to police spokesman Brian Schmautz, there were "a number of items thrown at our officers over the past few hours." According to Fox News, "Supporters of Bush... were jostled and taunted by protesters as they arrived for a fund-raiser."

Let's take a look at what the evil hoodwinkers at Fox decided not to show you.


My parents put me through tougher interrogations than the enemy combatants at Gitmo have been through. And no, they didn't give me La-Z-Boys and pastries to even the score. Knowing how evil the U.S. government is, they had to dramatize every case of fleas they conspired.



Although these Portlanders mix too much Chomsky in their marijuana, you gotta give them credit where credit is due: at least they aren't hypocrites when it comes to supporting American troops.



After years of book burnings, the ninjas wanted revenge. So they burned our flag.



Okay, I admit it. We have free enterprise in this country.

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Let's see if San Francisco's protest, held on the same day, was any better.

San Francisco, California
Population: 776,733

I think we're dreaming. After all, this is the city where a protester fell off a bridge at the beginning of the war.

Look at this worthy cause. Let's trade in Bush - or any gringo for that matter - for a dirty socialist like Hugo Chavez.

Umm, Sir, that flag isn't gonna hold itself up.

Given their track record, this man could be hired to teach at Kent State University.

The animal rights crowd might not take too kindly to this one.